Life has sent me crashing again after a whirlwind romance..that, well, never lasted.
There’s only one thing that doesn’t hurt…my teeth. I’m not getting enough sweets.
“You may rip your stitches. But it’s better (to run) than dying.”
How many times have I told myself that? Over 20 for the past 5 days being caged in isolation. I’ve been rocking my head back and forth, left to right (or was i shaking it?i don’t know!)…thinking what to do.thinking what i COULD do. Honestly, each time I do that, I feel like half of me is being taken somewhere insanely overcast with desperate gloom. And it feels different. As if I could leave this other part of me there adn stay forever. Uhuh. You don’t have to say it. I’m psychoneurotic in a way. Part of my reality is a dream and vice versa. Argh. Now I’d stop saying things like this for fear of being accused ignorant with what i’m talking about…when as a matter of fact, I’m not. It’s just that all this shit is beyond me and I have no time to waste explaining it. Capice?
Who says that I’ve never been rejected, dissed, ditched, dumped…ever?! Who says that I’ve always been adored, praised, wanted, loved?… I’ve always been disappointed all these years. Frustrated, despondent, forlorn… All because I keep asking one question… When will this LIFE ever learn to love me? I know I shouldn’t be complaining, but that’s being human. You always tend to complain. And to complain some more.
Hay…
“I always wonder why you can’t have everything,or at least give everything.”
