thoughts flying out of the window…
Remember 10 second Tom in the movie 50 First Dates? I’m afraid to say that I might end up like him if I don’t do anything about this sporadic absent-mindedness and everyone would start calling me Split Second Sarj (or triple S to make it catchy.LOL). Wah! I’m showing the signs!
Just a few minutes ago, my Mom handed out to me a chocolate chip cookie but I didn’t take it. She looked at me suspiciously and said that she thought I wanted to eat it because I asked for a piece. I was confused and asked where the cookie came from. Now she looked annoyed and answered “It’s from your sister and this is the third time you asked.” And that made me even more confused. It’s so weird, I could remember exchanging a few words with her before that but I couldn’t remember what it was about or even what I had said! So I said, “Really? I did?” My Mom and brother replied in chorus, “Yes”. What the hell was that? Wah!
That’s just the most recent episode of my “forgetfulness” and believe me, that one has quite a handful of precedents. Do you know that the readily identified symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease are short-term memory loss and visual-spatial confusion? Since it’s a progressive disease, it slowly starts to eat away the most recent to the very first memories of events in your life.
A cold chill spikes up the fine hairs over my skin. There are times when I wish I could just forget about everything, but the truth is - I don’t want to forget a single thing. What would happen to me if my mind should fail to remember those familiar faces? What would happen if I should forget how to feel and to make people feel special? Does it also mean that I won’t be able to learn to live my life alone anymore? Always depending on people where to go and what to do every single day? And if my mind won’t accept any new memories anymore, how could I learn to love again? Oh my God, I’d be good as dead. Everyone would simply turn into little footnotes in my life…and thinking about all these things scares the shit out of me.
But why should I worry?
After a second, I would forget about the existence of that emotion.
Doom. What am I talking about?:(
