Scribesmeister v4 (In Zero Gravity)

Last night I got caught talking for nearly an hour with my cousin about how to write a decent resignation letter and come up with a perfect excuse, getting through quarter-life crisis, decision making down to rehearsing what to say at an impact interview.

Although I have a slight inkling of what an impact interview is, I still had to ask her what questions are usually spring up during that type of interview. Anyway, I was right, impact interview is a screening requirement, usually for aspiring flight attendants and the likes (maybe actors and other entertainers, too?!), that would only give you 2-3 minutes to tell the interviewers something about yourself that would blow them away as in to show them your edge and not to ruin your chance of getting in. So cousin’s question was, “What do you think should I tell them?” I told her to just imagine herself as a hot commodity and start marketing (lol) - and then just focus on discussing the best thing about that product that would make it sell like hotcakes. And she sighed over the phone and asked me, “Could you write down what you think of me?” I said, “What?! No!” She asked why not and again I said it’s because I am no marketing major and if there’s something I really really like I wouldn’t go as far as convincing people why they should buy it…I’d give them both the pros and cons then I would simply say that for me it’s the best thing ever and if you think I can be trusted, you’d give it a shot.

After I hung up, I thought about what I just said…

It wasn’t a perfect thing to say, but what if it’s the best answer out there?

Yes, give it a shot - after all, if you don’t like it, you could either throw it out or find a way how it can serve its purpose better. You have to learn how to bring out the best in someone and give them a chance to prove themselves - yeah, I would do that once I become a boss.

Sometimes, well, oftentimes for me, the most amusing and totally unbelievable thing is what grabs your attention. It’s not the words that come out of your mouth, it’s the guts of you to say those words. Nothing beats self-confidence, really. Although I don’t think I have that much in me. My bestfriend, Ghi, who would always tell me back in those days that she wish she had my confidence doesn’t know that most of the time, I’ve been fighting off the urge to shrink back to my shell when everyone expects me to be strong and know everything when I am weak and totally clueless. Which I might say I believe that the best way to win a battle is to feign bravery and the best way to gain allies is to openly admit that you need them in order for you to grow and you seek their help because you cannot do all things alone.

*warning: crappy

Flowers came in as a surprise,
a beautiful arrangement of scarlet red,
I drew it close and slowly began
to sniff off the lovely scent,
but dejectedly I realized,
my sense of smell unknowingly went dead.

My sweet tooth aches for a generous bite
of a tempting heart-shaped white chocolate,
but at last minute, I had to resist and gently
put it down as it touched my lips,
for I cannot aggravate my sore throat’s fate.

Why would I let this setbacks
get into me, when it’s nothing
a bottle of beer couldn’t
manage to get rid of, I thought to myself…

And what do you know,
the ice cold beer
just made things worse.

Given that everybody knows I was no ordinary kid, I have collected more than enough scars , figuratively and literally speaking, from the past that always reminds me of how carefree and ballsy I have always been then until now. And as I think about how I was able to ride out the healing process, I do not remember where I got those bruises, nor do I remember the pain I had to endure while waiting for wounds to dry up - I only remember how good it felt when everything was finally over. Being able to sleep peacefully at night not worrying that bandages would fall off if I move too much and being able to smile knowing that I was no longer burdened with depressing thoughts…

But the cycle goes on and I never stop being a child for that matter. No two experiences are alike despite all its similar aspects or let me state it strongly this way, you surely don’t react to similar situations in the same way. I know, who can argue with that? Well, probably someone who is doused in damaging insensitivity - who I am not.

The calluses on my skin would only tell you that I am growing old because deep within, what the eye cannot see, I am not hiding a calloused heart and I am still capable of hurting.