Blame it on the bad weather, now I’m in the mood for some theatrical musings…
Sorting through my music and film collections, I’ve found out that my taste in a lot of things concerning music and films often do clash. I doubt if you would see the iconic RnB balladeer Joe and Metallica’s James Hetfield hanging out at the same party except at the Grammy’s. Well, but my books are different…most of them are under philosophical category, hence metaphorical in nature. Unlike most of my friends in elementary and high school, I’ve never been inclined to reading Sweet Valley although I admit, I have finished Bantam classics romance novels when I used to sit along with the girls during recess (my favorite subject!). But I didn’t frequent the library and queue up to borrow these mushy stuff, I only read books that are given to me even if it doesn’t interest me. I leaf through it mainly because I’d like to know what made them think of me when they bought it. Haha!
Here are a few examples of books given to me that I would never forget:
- Is He Mr. Right? - Mira Kirshenbaum
- The Princessa: Machiavelli for Women
- The Bridge Across Forever - Richard Bach
The first one obviously had me laughing when I got it as a present a few days after everyone learned that I finally changed my status to “in a relationship” from “single”. Hilarious! 
Well, all that book ever tried to tell me was to find all the faults and that I should feel miserable if my boyfriend doesn’t agree with everything I say. I know the author meant something else, but that’s how it came across to me. haha! Bottom line is, I don’t need anything like that to depend my decisions on! But maybe my friend thought I would find it helpful since I used to be pretty much of an idealist. I do have idealistic views but I am a realist when it comes to setting standards - so I try to not fall short of it. 
It’s like what Marilyn Monroe said, if you can make a girl laugh you can make her do anything. Well actually, that’s not true. If you can make me laugh, you are about 20 steps ahead out of a hundred. 
It’s easy to do, but to keep me laughing ’til I collapse on the floor isn’t. One has to be as crazy as me, don’t you think? LOL!
The second is a perfect tool to identify myself among the masses though every point almost always leads to feminism. I do uphold the dignity and rights of women all over the world but also of men - everyone! Let’s just not get too carried away with the saying that behind every great man is a great woman - each of us owes our success to our unfaltering belief in ourselves, in our abilities and of course the undying support that important people in our lives give us and not just our partners. So I thought maybe this was given to me to make me realize that guys are not the be-all and end-all of my existence. hahaha! I am no male or female chauvinist! I am pro-equality! Haha! At this point, I am not bothered that most of my closest friends are attached - I just do feel silly each time I look at these couples asking myself “Do my then-single friends feel this way when I used to have my own world with my special someone?” Haha! Silly, I tell you.
And lastly, the third book…well, it was given to me by my Aunt and I was glad she did. She just probably picked it up from the bookstore and passed it on to me only thinking that I might read it because I’m a certified bookworm. Anyway, I didn’t open that book for more than two years before I finally rearranged my shelves and found it sandwiched between dusty old books. I just told you that I am not fond of reading romance novels and Richard Bach isn’t exactly the author who would throw in bathetic emotionalism from the beginning ’til the end. His works are often metaphorical and philosophical in context and The Bridge Across Forever isn’t an exception although those who have read it would probably say it’s a romance novel because it is fused with passionate evocation on loving and finding the love of your life. I honestly loved this novel as much as I loved his other books. This was the time when I dreamt of flying quite often and when I used to fantasize about becoming a pilot (actually until now). Haha!
I have also highlighted these lines with a red marker. Haha. Yes, I used to mess up my books but I threw away my markers after using the last one on Paolo Coelho’s The Alchemy. So here goes…
“A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.”
Apparently, I do believe in soulmates. I believe that they do not appear perfect but they make us complete and make you feel that you can work things out despite the imperfections and differences. I’ve actually read stuff about it (I like to.haha) and do you want to know the saddest part? Soulmates don’t usually end up with each other because of tons of complications along the way (so it does take a lot of effort) and sometimes it becomes too late to realize that this person is the right one for you after you’ve let them go. But even if you’re now living different lives, you know that there will always be an aching hallow part in you that no one else can fill in even if you are forever in denial.
One more reason why I like this one is because Richard Bach and I share the same philosophy in life:
“Our true nature is not bound by space or time, we are expressions of the Is (see: Non-duality), we are not truly born nor truly die, and we enter this world of seems and appearances for fun, learning, to share experiences with those we care for, to explore—and most of all to learn how to love and love again.”
Our difference though is, he is not afraid to find out if this person is his soulmate and to fight for his love if he has to whereas I am *gulp* not brave enough. Right, be harsher, I am a chickenshit. 
I am just not sure how I’d handle another heartbreak, that is to say I might not know how to stitch it up again.
*shuts up my mind*
So I still have a pile of unread books and on my desk now is one by Murakami and another by Nick Hornby. Hmm, I think I’d start with the latter because Hornby is an expert in combining comedy and melodrama. I want to be able to laugh at this reality as if it’s some kind of a sick joke that doesn’t make you feel good because it’s aimed at you but doesn’t make you feel bad either because everyone’s supposed to find it funny. Isn’t it that when you laugh, the whole world laughs with you but when you cry, you cry alone? So better yet, just laugh until you cry. Might be good for you.
I keep changing my mind, maybe I shouldn’t go out anymore and just read books. *anti-social alert*
Again, blame it on the bad weather.
